Project Life. insecurities. anorexia. miscarrage. real life. and currently

Before I skip ahead to what I am so excited to share with you today... My Project Life Title  Page(s).... I have a few words... my heart... to share with you.

I have made a shift in the last few weeks... e-mails were sent and decisions were made. I have really loved creating over the last few months and have been praying for direction in that area. Praying over where I would be heading. and the heart tugs have been strong and the path more evident. I have been feeling led more and more towards Project Life. and most of what I am creating will center around that. Our life is busy and I am putting too much time into creative endeavors, so I am finding balance.  There is a lot on my plate and even though I love making traditional pages, I know I only have time for a couple each month, so you will still see those, but for now they will be less.... and every one intentional, with more stories and words, and more details. They will be for me... and that warms my heart to think of it. *smile*

so here is a start. the first few pages of my Project Life. It starts with a sequence of Title pages. The reason I have created it this way was because I just had so much I wanted to start the book with and I have a feeling that this year my album will be much fuller of inserts and extras that make our story more complete.

When you open the cover this is the first glance. see that picture in the top corner. let's pause there for a minute..... and to be honest. this was a struggle. I had to add a photo of me, too, though. I had to... and it almost drove me FROM this project. I cried. I had been hiding for SO long... probably since bedrest, and all those miscarriages, and since I started carrying around so much extra weight. weight I despise. Weight that eats me up inside. I am healing, always, from a difficult past with a vicious and consuming disease. and every day I struggle just to let anyone see me. at all. revealing pictures of me this year has taken a courage I did not know I even had, but for my daughters, for the good of what can come of it, I AM. and I am learning to be okay with it. all of my insecurities will not hold me back from doing what is right in 2013.and all those stories there is more to tell and I will.... soon.

I used the Studio Calico Darling Dear chevron vellum paper  as a base. I added a print out by Cathy Zielske. I used two other print outs by her, as well, on my largest protector.  I then added a Number 8 brad by Basic Grey and a Studio Calico "Happy" badge. On the reverse you will see a small pocket. This holds a special note to me, from me. Something I need to tell myself and something I can look back on at the end of the year.

 The next insert is my favorite and is far from perfect. I decided to sew with my baby in the Ergo and after I place the 7 Gypsies arrow brad in place so it ended up being a bit messier than planned, but it is all it should be imperfectly perfectly telling the story of us..... through the eye of the one who takes most of the photos. that would be me.

 {you can click on this to read it if you wish, honest completely}

 The made in the USA key is a precious treasure from a Paper Bakery scrapbook kit. The papers are all from previous Studio Calico kits... which were the most treasured of gifts from a dear friend. The 7 gypsies arrow brad turner is so old I think I may have had it when I only had three children.... and the stitching is all messed up wonderful.

Next you will find a monthly divider from Becky Higgins. I loved covering the whole divider with the Gray Washi Adhesive Sheet by We R Memory Keepers. I then added a Basic Grey Soleil Exclusive Vellum Sticker.

 

I also finished it off with a Studio Calico badge.

and here is the final page. It is simple pictures of all of us (minus that husband who needs his picture taken still) and simple cards. I added little sequins and enamel dots to the cars, as well as a stamp and a badge to the "&" card. On each pocket where I placed our photos I added a simple Basic Grey letter and a "potty" person by Studio Calico.

Lastly, I am playing along with this currently challenge (click above for link). The print outs are so cute and my children and I enjoyed filling some out together. I love how different they all are and will enjoy seeing how this change... maybe weekly, maybe monthly. These cards are tucked behind the photos on our cover page.

and here are the backs.... I plan on dating and signing them all year.

and currently as cute as these are cards are, seriously this year is not starting as I planned. It is harder and not what I wanted in so many ways. and I do not get it. at all.

sometimes I just do not know what God is doing. WHY He is doing it... and what the purpose could possibly be. it doesn't make sense. at all. maybe it never will here on this earth. 





but in the end I know who He is. He is mighty, He is powerful, He is just. He is merciful. He is faithful. and He will reveal what I need. when I need.

and I will keep journeying this life. and this project is a part of that. capturing the good, the bad, the everyday. capturing the blessings. and recounting them. capturing and appreciating. what if it takes a book of memories to do that? what if it takes making sure you take pictures? write little notes down? what if when you do this you can live with more thankfulness. more peace. more awareness of God's faithfulness. if a little book can do this for me....

maybe it could for you?

Join me. Notice. Appreciate. Capture. Create. Journal. Count Your Blessings. Again.

it's what Project Life is all about.


note:
all of my pages are currently using Becky Higgins Protectors and an American Crafts D ring 12x12 album.